As "epic adventures" go, Ninja Gaiden II doesn't, though it pretends at it quite nicely. But to call Ninja Gaiden II anything more than a flat out brawler is misleading. Sure, it's suppose to play out as an action/adventure, complete with hokum plot, sweeping (befuddling) camera work, faux-sprawling (linear) level design (A to B, beat boss/gang, next... only cleverly disguised as big and sprawling because it neglects to actually tell you where "B" is), perplexing purpose (boss battles give a whole new meaning to "stab in the dark"), and a rambling assortment of platform-hopping, bauble collecting tasks, but all that is just sloppy window dressing for what is otherwise a delicious hack n' slash game, smooth, slick, menacing and sexy as ever.
And holy violent: a big time, multi-weapon gore fest, this game is soooo not for kids it isn't funny. Well, it is funny in that macabre-catharsis sort of way, but to be clear: limb hacking galore, blood-spurting decapitations, gut chucking gore, gore, gore. It's enough to make you forget that Ninjas are suppose to be all about stealth and trickery and defensive combat. Bah, go crazy.
- Ninja Gaiden II TIP: In Chapter 4 of Ninja Gaiden II, slice through a breakable straw wall in the Statue of Liberty museum and you'll find a silver Xbox that will restore you to full health.














